Complaining is not to be confused with informing someone of their mistakes or deficiency so it can be put right. And to refrain from complaining does not necessarily mean putting up bad behavior or quality. It’s not complaining if you tell the waiter that the soup he is serving is cold and needs to be heated – if you stick to the facts which are always neutral. How dare you serve me cold – that’s complaining. — ECKART TOLLE
Before Knowing 6 ways to stop complaining and start living, let’s see why do we fall into this trap of complaining —
Will Bowen shares five reasons why people complain, in his book Complaint free world as G.R.I.P.E.
Complaining is more like a developed habit. Research shows that most people complain once a minute during a typical conversation. Its human tendency to bend towards negativity fast. It’s easy to pinpoint towards some faulty behavior rather than appreciating what’s good in it.
Complaining also gives us an escape when we fail. Complaining keeps people from taking action. The attitude of complaining develops the habit of procrastination and therefore keeps us from achieving goals that we set for ourselves. It’s always much easier to complain than to find a solution.
Repeated complaining rewires our brain to make future complaining more likely. Complaining becomes our default behavior, which also changes how people perceive us. Usually, everyone prefers to be with someone who is joyful, so people start avoiding the person who is always complaining about one thing or other.
Constant complaining also damages a few areas of our brain. As described by Dr. Travis Bradberry in website www.talentsmart.com, research from Stanford University has shown that complaining shrinks the hippocampus — an area of the brain that’s critical to problem-solving and intelligent thought. Frequent complaining releases the stress hormone cortisol, which impairs our immune system and makes us more susceptible to high cholesterol, diabetes, heart disease, and obesity.
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HOW TO BREAK THROUGH FROM THE HABIT OF COMPLAINING
If you don’t like it, change it. If you can not change it, change your attitude.
Our outside world is like a mirror which reflects our inner self. So if we think about positive things and feel Happy, we will experience the same in our life.
Complaining doesn’t solve the problems but when our mindset becomes of that of complaining all the time then that’s what we experience more and more in our life.
The good news is that its pretty easy to get rid of the habit of complaining. You can easily live an ABUNDANT LIFE of infinite possibilities by following the 6 ways to stop complaining and start living:
1. Pay Attention To Your Thoughts
When we complain, we make ourselves a victim of the situation. Be more self-aware. Be conscious of the words, thoughts, actions, and mindset. For example, even if you happen to have a bad day and someone asks you ‘how are you doing? Then instead of complaining about the day, you can say “I am doing well, how are you?” Its all about changing your mindset. Do not wait for your friend or family to tell you that you are complaining. If you can recognize your mindset of constant complaining, you can quickly shift from it and look for the solutions.
SELF AWARENESS is the first key towards an abundant life.
2. Uncover The Real Reason Of Complaining
It is important to discover the real reason behind complaining. It is important to know how does complaining make you feel. We fall into the habit of complaining when we fail to achieve our goals in life and start feeling frustrated. We start complaining when we fail to fulfill the expectations of our loved ones.
Remember nobody is perfect in this world. And nobody needs to be perfect in the world. There’s Perfection in the Imperfection. You are the most beautiful being on earth and don’t need to prove anything to anyone. Do your best. Failures do not mean the end of life.
3. Attitude Of Gratitude
Gratitude is the opposite of being discontented. Gratitude changes your perspective on life. It can sweep away the habit of cribbing. Gratitude increases feelings of well-being and generates a positive attitude towards life.
There is always something to be grateful for, no matter how negative or wrong things may seem. In the blog, 32 things you should be grateful for, by the author Sanah Rizvi there is a list that will help you to recognize the things that you can be grateful for, in your life.
When you feel like complaining, writing down at least 5 things to be grateful for will really help you to change your mindset immediately.
4. Happy Surroundings, Happy You.
Your company impacts your mindset. So don’t stay in the company of chronic complainers. Change your social circle as soon as you recognize the pattern.
Whenever you experience a negative feeling or mood, change it immediately. Listen to your favorite music, cook yourself your favorite food, take a nature walk. And if nothing seems to work, “sleep”. A good sleep helps our mind to relax.
The best time to be HAPPY is always NOW.
5. Affirmations
Your company impacts your mindset. So don’t stay in the company of chronic complainers. Change your social circle as soon as you recognize the pattern.
Whenever you experience a negative feeling or mood, change it immediately. Listen to your favorite music, cook yourself your favorite food, take a nature walk. And if nothing seems to work, “sleep”. A good sleep helps our mind to relax.
The best time to be HAPPY is always NOW.
5. Affirmations
6. Meditation
Stress and anxiety are major triggers of depression, and meditation can alter your reaction to those feelings. “Meditation trains the brain to achieve sustained focus, and to return to that focus when negative thinking, emotions, and physical sensations intrude — which happens a lot when you feel stressed and anxious,” says Dr. John W. Denninger, director of research at the Benson-Henry Institute for Mind Body Medicine at Harvard-affiliated Massachusetts General Hospital (excerpt from How meditation helps with depression ) .
The mind, heart, and body can improve with regular meditation. Meditation eases chronic pain, anxiety, stress, improve health, boost mood and catalyzes an Abundant Life. Here is a youtube meditation video.
Conclusion
Please never waste even a second of your life complaining about the things you can’t change. Find out what makes you happy and do more of those activities. Smile and spread that smile in the whole world. Follow 6 ways to stop complaining and start living as much as possible. Last but not the least, I will conclude with a clip from a movie ye jawani hai diwani. ..
Thank You😍 May God Bless Us All😀
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